Little Wonders

from Unearthedcomics.com

Those who have chronic illnesses probably understand quite well when I say that one lives it 24/7.  It becomes an obsession, how one feels.  You monitor every little symptom and if something new comes along, you immediately think that something is terribly wrong.  The internet doesn't help - you can Google every symptom and find a host of causes, a lot of them terrifying.  And naturally you pick the absolute worse cause.

I'm no different, and of course it drives me nuts (well, I'm already nuts - it just pushes me further along).

When I'm feeling particularly out of sorts, as I have been recently, I try, I really try, to think about life's little pleasures, the things that feed me, that make me laugh.  (Yeah, this is going to be one of those 'uplifting' kinds of posts so feel free to exit now) 

I suppose the most constant source of amusement for me would be the feline contingent.  Junior and Maggie, even at their most annoying, are funny little creatures that constantly amaze me.  I have a large fan that sits on the floor of my parlor and Junior and I discovered during the summer that he can sit behind the fan and grab at Da Bird and pull it through an opening under the fan.  It's been several months and he still hasn't tired of the game.  And I don't dare put the fan away even though it's October.

Michele at a flea market we went to

Will, Cathy (seated),
Jan and I (red sweater)

Friends and family, as few as I have of them, keep me going.  They listen to me whine, they push me through barriers, and rejoice with me at small and large triumphs.  And I'm totally grateful for them - my brother & sister-in-law Will & Cathy, cousin Jan, and my friends Michele & Adam, Krista, Ricky, Lisa, Cynthia & Kay, Maude, Mama in Law Lucille and others - Thank You.

I am continually awed by the sunsets I see from my sixth floor window.  I don't see sunrises - I'm not usually up early enough.  I spent years in apartments surrounded by buildings that blocked full views of sunsets - now I revel in them.  My photos aren't that great but who cares?  They still make me smile.

Music is one of the things I don't think I could really live without.  Whether it's Beethoven, which I'm listening to right now, or the 2014 80's Rewind Festival I saw earlier on VH1, or Cajun, bluegrass, Arabic, Pink Floyd, and so on and so on, my tastes are wide ranging.  

Buckingham Palace scene in
"A Scandal in Belgravia", "Sherlock"

I'm also getting some joy out of current TV obsessions, whether it's slowly getting through full seasons of "Midsomer Murders" on Netflix (an English series), "Nova" or "Secrets of the Dead" on PBS, or something I became obsessed with this summer - "Sherlock."  Yes indeed.  Sherlock.  I admit it - if I need to calm down after a particularly difficult day I will watch a scene from "Sherlock" on Youtube.  




Then there's the flowers - those who read this blog regularly have seen me post about the flowers I see when I'm walking.  And trees.  Especially a tree on the Butler Hospital campus in Providence that looks to me like two trees intertwined.  




And, oh, the silly things.  Art by Ricky Gagnon, cartoons by Greg Stones, and bright pink minivans in the parking lot of a local supermarket.  Cross-dressing lumberjacks and silly walks.  Puns and nerdy jokes.  Wacky posts about animals from Cynthia, Ricky, and others on FB. Funny magnets from an Etsy shop called Beanforest.  Stupid memes shared on Facebook.

  I could go on for hours but that would be boring, I'm sure.  

And I haven't even gotten to the thing that gets me through most days - making art.  When I've talked to others who also deal with severe mental illness, most are surprised that even in the midst of severe episodes I'm able to make art.  After all, they say, "I can't even get out of bed when I'm bad."  

There are times when that's really where I want to be--in bed, or somewhere else, hiding from the world.  And it truly is often a struggle to stay out of bed or stay off the couch watching TV just to occupy time. Making art, or preparing things for pieces (such as cutting out images, making backgrounds, sorting papers), gives me a reason to keep going these days, as it has since I lost my job because of my illness 4 1/2 years ago.

I'm sure that it's one of the major reasons I'm still alive, quite frankly.

I try to maintain as positive an attitude as I can, which lately has been quite difficult.  That's one of the reasons I decided to pull together an "uplifting," "saccharinely sweet," "inspirational" blog post.  Perhaps numbering the good things in my life instead of obsessing over the bad might help for a little while.

We'll see.

later,
lin

Process, Process, Process

I hope you're not bored with this continuing series detailing the journal exchange between my friend Lisa Busch and me.  I just like to show you things I'm working on, and since I have a bit of a bully pulpit with this blog you'll just have to put up with it.  

I've started a new journal, since the one that currently has been with Lisa (and which has been mailed back to me) is just about filled up.  I like to make my own journals rather than buy them, so the journal itself was made with watercolor paper sheets that I cut down to size, and I added two pieces of black cover stock to use as covers.  I then brought the pages down to Staples for binding, rather than use my Bind-it-All (I'm lazy), and voila! A journal.

I started out plastering old text pages all over, something which I've been enjoying doing recently.

 Yes, I know - they don't look that much different from each other, do they?  But wait.....

The next photos show that I've added some rub ons to each page of the first spread, then added additional embellishments, and one figure of a priest on one page, and two people talking on the phone on the other page.

The rub-ons I used were discontinued by their company, 7 Gypsies, and I bought a bunch of this pattern from Lisa some time ago.  I normally use rub-ons to add background to the magnets that I make but thought I'd use them for the journals.  The strip of fabric trim on the left page is also from Lisa's shop (collagestuff.com)






The priest image came from a Dover collection, I think the "Men" collection.  The people talking on the phone images came from TheGraphicsFairy.com, a great site for finding free, quality, vintage graphics. 

I finished the two pages by adding quotes from two songs by Pink Floyd: "What Do You Want From Me?" on the left, and "Keep Talking" on the right. 

Often, when I'm working on pieces I forget to take photos documenting the whole process, so for the second set of pages I can only show you the finished product.

With this set of pages, I added lots of embellishments without really planning anything.  When I'm doing the journals, I don't plan.  I simply take stuff and stick it.  Sometimes I'll stencil, sometimes I'll use rubber stamps.  It's whatever I feel like doing.  I don't have a theme in mind most of the time either, and this set definitely shows it since I had no clue how to finish the second page after I glued the cat's head to it.  I just left it as is.  


On the other page, however, I decided to add a quote from another Pink Floyd song, "Wearing the Inside Out."  The songs I've quoted from are from their The Division Bell album, something I've been playing over and over lately.  I've been thinking a lot lately about hiding, about communication, about demands, and I felt that I wanted these pages to reflect that.  Except for the cat page.  There's no deeper meaning to it.  

On these pages, I used some gold punch paper that I got from a local art store, cheapo tissue paper from Dollar Tree, old buttons, and more rub-ons from 7 Gypsies.  Both the images are from Dover books but I don't know which ones.

Hope you've enjoyed yet another excursion into art-making.  I'm thinking that these might become larger projects someday.

later,
lin

A Happy Project

I occasionally do commissions and I enjoy them because I'm able to tailor the project to specifications given to me by the buyer.  Plus, it's often for a happy occasion, such as a birthday or Christmas.  

Twice in 2014 I have been honored to do cards for gay weddings, both commissioned by the same person, Stacie.  First it was a card for friends, and most recently a card for her niece and her partner who got married last weekend here in Rhode Island.

The first time I did a card for Stacie, I finished 7 cards.  I then had her choose her favorite, as well as a personalized caption, which included the couple's names.  I listed the remainder in my shop, and these are a couple of them.  You can check out the listings by clicking on the caption.

Card #1

Card #2

The couple loved the card and had it framed professionally.  I know several other recipients of my cards who have done the same, and it's a huge compliment.

In August, Stacie mentioned that she had another wedding coming up -- would I mind doing another card?  Absolutely!

This time around, I gave Stacie a larger role in the process.  I made 10 different card fronts, 5 silver and 5 gold, and had her choose which one she wanted.  Unfortunately, I didn't scan the fronts for you to look at.  You'll see the final result momentarily.  I then told her that I would pull together a bunch of female couple images and get them to her to choose from.  

Some of her choices included:  

It took Stacie a while to choose the couple she wanted.  In the meantime I was deciding upon additional ornamentation, and was thinking about turning the remaining card fronts into romance/wedding/anniversary cards - which I haven't finished doing, and may not for a while.   I also gave her a list of possible captions, using her niece and partner's names or not.

Non-sequitur:  I have to say that I'm very thankful that Etsy exists as a source for finding things to use in my work.  Ebay used to be my go-to source but it's so difficult to find things there these days.  Etsy has loads of sellers with the types of items I need, ranging from images to ribbon to papers, although I also source my materials from quite a number of companies, ranging from local fabric, art, and craft stores to large companies like Home-Sew.  Some of my favorite paper companies are no longer in business, alas, so I've had to scurry around looking for new suppliers.  As it turned out, none of the items I bought from Etsians were used on the card, but I had a ball looking for things and I have several items (bows, ribbons, paper etc) I can use for future projects.

In any case, Stacie finally chose a couple and a caption, and I finished the card.  Exit a happy customer with this card:

I saw Stacie last week, and she said while she hasn't heard from her niece about the card, it was admired by everyone who saw it - and hopefully some of those folks will wander over to the shop.

For what it's worth, the items used in making the card are as follows:

• gold metallic cardstock purchased at the Rhode Island School of Design store
• gold and ivory figured paper also purchased at the RISD store
• white tulle flower purchased in a small quantity from Home-sew
• gold foil (German/Dresden Scrap) embellishments from collagestuff.com
• female couple image from one of Dover Publications'  many fashion collections - I cannot remember which one, unfortunately, but their books are invaluable to me

I hope you've enjoyed this glimpse into the fun world of commissioned work.

later,
lin

Making More Art

Last week I wrote about some art journaling I'd done in the journal exchange I'm doing with my friend Lisa Busch.  You can find the post here, which details the process I used to create the pages.   

I thought you'd like to see more pages done at the same time.  I don't remember which pages are in which journal, but I tend to think the ones with the man and the saying about negativity are in my journal.  

The pages with my statement about negativity is really a play on the reputation I have for being rather like a Pollyanna - always positive.  However, several years ago a former friend was upset with me because she felt that I was being overly negative about some people we both knew.  I was speaking the truth about them, actually, but "Marie" didn't like it.  

In recent years, that positive image has slipped a bit as my life changed and things got a little rough.  I still try to maintain a 'glass half full' attitude, but sometimes it's a little harder to do so.  I thought it would be funny to pair my statement with an image I got from an Etsy shop called Veetzy Innovations  which sells fabulous digital downloads of original photographs.You can find the man's image (still available) here.   The man looks so dour, and I love him.


 The next two pages are in Lisa's journal.  I think the first couple is from a CD sold in Lisa's shop, collagestuff.com, and I've had a photo of the second couple for years, and I'm not sure where it came from.  One of my trademarks in my work is to add a wry or humorous caption, and these are no exception.  I'm not sure why on earth I added the pink piece from a doily, though.  That just looks so out of place now.



The final two pages feature two women's images that I found in the Dover Publications of Victorian etchings featuring women, which you can find at Amazon here.  Dover is a great resource for these kinds of collections, and I couldn't do my work without them.  The woman on the right doesn't say anything but I added a man's hat to her, which I think looks cute.  The woman on the right has a sad expression, possibly because she has to read "The Good Wife Guide."  I got the idea about the "Good Wife Guide" after seeing a reference to an actual book of that title on Amazon.  It's a reprint of an article published in the 1940s or 1950s.  There is a book for husbands as well.  Someday I might actually buy them myself.

Hopefully you've enjoyed this look at the journal pages.  As I'm starting a new journal for this exchange (my other book is running out of pages), I'm sure I'll share more.

later,
lin

A Victory of Sorts

My family and health providers are anxious that I not stay home - I've had the habit of isolating myself lately and even I admit that it's not healthy.  Much to their surprise, I announced plans to go to Boston last Friday.  Boston, the state capital of Massachusetts, is about 40-odd miles from where I live and takes 1 1/2 hours by train.

I actually had business to conduct.  During the summer I applied for a half-fare disabled pass (Charlie Card) to ride commuter rail and transportation within the Boston area.  I got the approval letter last week, and I would have to go to the Charlie Card office in downtown Boston to have a photo taken for the card.  I wanted the pass originally to attend a meeting of a New England arts group which I chickened out of.  As usual.  But this time I was determined that I needed to do something, anything, to break out of routine. 

So I did it.  On the way up, leaving from Providence's train station, I paid full price for a one-way ticket.  On the way home I'd pay half price and that'd be less than round trip.) 




I landed at South Station, which is huge.  It's a major transportation hub for Amtrak, for one thing, and thousands of people pass through each day, both tourists and commuters.  And I picked up the pass after some confusion about where the office actually was. 

My plan was to go to favorite places in Boston to see what was still there.  The last time I'd done a trip like this to Boston was several years ago, and I knew that things would be gone.  My plan Friday was to go first to Harvard Square and wander around.

I didn't take a lot of photos, actually.  It was a gray, overcast day (NOT sunny as promised), and I wasn't really in the mood.

Gradually I developed a plan while wandering.  At one time I'd visited a stationery store called Bob Slate Stationers which I remembered as being in a rickety first floor store front somewhere up on Mass Avenue.  Didn't find it.  Then I remembered (duh) I could Google the store to see if it was still around.  Yes, it was, at a different location on Brattle Street.

One of the reasons I really wanted to go was because the store I remembered had lots of neat office supplies you couldn't find other places.  The main one, however, was that at that time they were selling wonderful handmade paper.  I'm getting to the end of the paper I'd bought the last time I went (probably 10 years ago), and wanted to replace it or get something else.

And I found it.  But, alas, they no longer had as much a selection of fine papers on their own, but only some fine papers to be used as wrapping paper.  However, the papers were really fun and I bought 3 sheets, plus a t-square.  I've never owned a t-square and it's a useful tool.  

I wandered up and down Brattle Street, looking at buildings, and just enjoying the moment, the novelty of being in a place that was both familiar and unfamiliar.  Picked up a couple of souvenirs that I'll use as small Christmas gifts.  Listened to buskers doing their business on the square - some good, some not so great - but I dropped dollars into the buckets because musicmaking should be encouraged.  Pretended, for just for a little while, to be a student at a place I'd longed to be accepted by. 

Another place I wanted to visit was Out of Town News, a Harvard Square institution, where you can get newspapers from around the world and all kinds of publications that are hard to find elsewhere.   I didn't buy anything, but it was fun to browse.

By this time, however, I was starting to have a panic attack in the middle of Harvard Square, and it angered me, which increased the panic.  I'd really wanted to walk through the Boston Common, as well as explore Washington Street, one of the downtown shopping districts.  Not to shop, but again to see what was still there.  
I knew that that wasn't going to happen now, not with a panic attack.  I admitted that I'd have to come home earlier than planned.  And so I took the T back to South Station and picked up the Purple Line (the nickname for the commuter rail system) back to Providence, and then the bus home.

In some ways the trip was a failure in that I wasn't able to do all that I'd wanted to do.  The panic attack stemmed from being around thousands of people milling about - and also memories of having been there often with the person who abused me.  

I wanted to take Boston back - for myself - you see.

But I did it.  I got there, I broke out of routine, a usual routine consisting only of necessary trips to necessary destinations, and then a quick retreat back to the safety of home.  I knew friends and family were egging me on, wanting me to do this, and I accomplished the small bit of business needing to be done.

And that's a victory.

later,
lin

I still do art journals

At least I'm still doing the art journal exchange with my friend Lisa Busch of Collagestuff.com.  If you do any kind of mixed media art or collage art, you need to check out her site.  Seriously.  I buy from her at least once a month if I can.  In fact, the stencils I use come from her shop.

As I was saying, Lisa and I exchange journals about every two weeks and I want to show you what I did with one of the spreads.  Actually what we do is send both journals at once to each other, then the other sends them back.

I started out by covering a set of pages in my journal with various papers.

After doing that, I had intended to simply add images and 3D embellishments, but then I decided to go back to using paint, which I'd not been doing out of frustration with not being able to use stencils properly (too much paint, blurred images, etc).  This time I decided to try spraying the paint on and not care if I used too much paint.  This is something I've wanted to do with one of the new collages I'm working on, so I figured I'd experiment first in the journal.

I mixed 3 different paint colors with water in spray bottles - an off white, red oxide, and a metallic gold.  And spray I did

I used three stencils - swirls, letters, and diagonal lines, and just poured on the paint, with 2 of the stencils looking something like this, and I then decided to drip the excess paint onto the pages.  It took a little while afterwards to clean them in soapy water, which I did before the paint dried too much.

I decided to stop the painting at this stage.  But I wasn't sure what to do next, then I looked again at Lisa's journal page.  She'd done a, I think, lightheaded look at monsters.

My answer:

I used a quote by Stephen King that I'd heard at the end of a "Criminal Minds" episode (they do a quote at the beginning and end of each episode that applies to the story), which I verified elsewhere:  

"Monsters are real, and ghosts are real too.  

           They live inside us, and sometimes, they win."

Quite honestly, when I'd heard the quote recited on that episode it had a great impact as I deal with internal ghosts and monsters daily.  I've long wanted to use it in an art piece, and this seemed to be a good opportunity.

After adding the words, using 24 point Poor Richard as a font, the pages looked a bit empty, so I simply added buttons as an accent.  Red on each side.  I still thought it needed an added punch and I decided to use a contrasting color, an olive green, in the corners.

And I was satisfied.

What do you think?

later,
lin