What may be more an accurate description of what I mean about cleaning the toilet is actually the peace one can find in doing menial tasks. I'm far from the first to talk about this. Many authors have written about using menial tasks to grow closer to God, to free the mind to consider more lofty things. Agatha Christie is said to have commented that the best way to grow ideas is to wash the dishes. I can understand that.
So I started thinking a while ago about this business of cleaning toilets as an exercise in cultivating serenity. It's a reaction to my years of living a hoarder's lifestyle where one really had a hard time navigating amongst the piles. And as a result I became less and less able to do housework. It was a chore! One easy to neglect. And neglect I did, growing ever more depressed as things got less and less tidy. When I moved here 3 years ago I essentially said goodbye to all that, abandoning a good 80% of my possessions to whomever wanted it. True, I could have donated everything to Goodwill or the Salvation Army--I'm sorry, I couldn't even deal with that chore. I needed a total purge, and leaving things behind worked for me.
Once in the new space I resolved to keep it tidy and as uncluttered as possible. And so I started the daily routines of sweeping, dusting, lint rolling the couch and recliner and, yes, cleaning the bathroom. I have become a quasi-expert in the virtues of one cleaner over another. I discovered that one didn't need to buy name brand Swiffer cloths, but that the best store brand was made by Dollar Tree. Yes, really. I've tried a lot of lint rollers to get cat hair off furniture, but right now like one that I get at my local supermarket. I've experimented with dusters, and have found one at Family Dollar that I really like. It's harder to find dusters that I like.
I have also found that for cleaning the bathroom I like Spic and Span's Antibacterial Spray. For one thing it's a pretty interesting shade of green. I like seeing how much is in the bottle. I'm using 409 right now and don't like it much.
OK, so all this discussion of cleaning products and such is pretty boring. I imagine most people find cleaning pretty boring. It can be.
For me, though, it's become a way for me to center, to calm myself. (although I can get a little obsessive about it). The sheer act of moving the sweeper around in circles and arcs soothes me. Spraying the cleaner on the sink and toilet satisfies me. Dusting is less interesting, and I'm not so fond of lint rolling--I just don't want to be wearing cat hair on my rear and my back.
But I have become concerned, for instance, that I get into panic mode if I don't do the cleaning first thing in the morning. I'm not sure why this started - it seems like I think that if I don't do it
Part of the reason I sweep daily is I do hate the feel of cat litter under my feet. I am still trying to understand why, after I've cleaned out the litter box and swept up around it, Junior is compelled to use the box and kick still more litter out of the box.
And I fight a war against cat hair. No sooner do I sweep up cat hair than I find more. Junior delights in this I'm sure. I do wish he'd clean up after himself. But no, he sits on the table or the recliner or the window sill and looks down and wonders what Mom is doing. Like a dog, he has to follow me.
I suppose doing homely tasks like the toilet cleaning ease my symptoms. I haven't spoken to any of my friends about this. They'd probably think I'm nuts, to coin a phrase. Most people consider cleaning to be an awful chore. And I'm not saying I enjoy every task--I hate washing my floors, and I'm not fond of putting dishes away--although I love washing them. Give me a really gunky frying pan and I'm delighted.
Cleaning does help me. But I am NOT available to clean anybody's house. Even if you paid me. And let me know if you want to wash my floors.
